Inopportune Moments
by TR-Fanfic
Summary: At a crucial moment Harm and Mac are interrupted by the ringing of the phone.  How will they handle this intrusion?


This is my response to the HBX August 2007 Challenge. It's nothing important, but it may "ring" a few bells for some of us.

This story is dedicated to my sister who always knows the wrong time to call me.

I don't own JAG but if I did, I would have looked back at the best rated seasons and tried to write scripts that were of the same dynamics and quality.

Inopportune Moments

By TR

Rated generally Mature

Why does he always have to call when I have a mouth full of breast? Warm, tan, beautiful, tasty breast. Is it a conspiracy? A fluke? Some sort of crazy cosmic clairvoyance that allows him to feel the shift in the universe when Mac and I come together? I always knew that time stood still for me the moment I touched her. Until now, until this millionth time that his call has pierced the haze and yanked us back to reality, I didn't consider the possibility that our monumental lovemaking would be the literal cause of a rift in the space-time continuum, and turn everyone else's world on it's ear as well. How else would he always know? Somehow it doesn't surprise me. Nothing about us together has ever been anything but extraordinary.

I'd contemplate this theory further if I actually gave a damn. Temporal physics, while interesting, don't hold a candle to the breast in my mouth. Or the woman to whom the breast belongs. The tip of her finger is tracing over my cheek, my cue to pull just a little, take in more, give her the "tip of the tongue to the nipple to the tip to the nipple and swirl" maneuver. One of those moves I learned on accident and found I hit the jackpot. She gasps, I groan. Half in triumph, half in frustration as the phone blares once more in my ears. She's unaffected. Doesn't she hear that? I look into her eyes and find them hazy and all black and full of nothing but my reflection. I hold her in my gaze, try to dive in. Reconnect. Ignore the ringing in my ears. She smiles as I struggle to find our place. That place where hearts and souls and lives intersect. We there just a second ago. Wrapped up in a world formed by nothing but the tangle of sheets and the ebb and flow of her skin against mine. I sigh in relief, as the phone falls silent. Believing we truly have a respite, I grin. Wrap my hands around her narrow ribs and lift her high. Greedily I latch on to the other breast.

RING

Son of a bitch! Every time! Why was I stupid enough to take another mouth full? I know it's him, even before the computerized caller ID voice announces it. What the hell is going on? Does he have us under surveillance? I release her and see a bit of reality creep into her eyes as well. We're headed directly toward a brick wall and there's not a traffic light to be found.

"Ignore it?" I plead with her.

"I'd love to." She grins and tackles me down to the mattress, but I can feel her hesitation. "What if something's wrong?" She whispers in my ear.

"Nothing's wrong. He just has a knack for calling when my mouth is too full to talk on the phone."

She laughs. "Or mine is…But Harm, he's called twice in 2 minutes. It could be important."

"Mac…"

She raises an eyebrow. "We can finish this later. Or start all over again. That's always fun."

I stroke her hair. She's staggeringly beautiful. How is it possible to know my knees are weak, when she has me flat on my back? I kiss her soft and full. I don't want to start again. I want to get back to where we were. In one of those moments when I don't know where she ends and I begin. I know we'll have that again, and I'm capable of waiting. But…I don't want to. Can't I have my wife? Now? Call me Veruca Salt, but I want her now! What could possibly be so important that I can't have my girl on a rainy Sunday afternoon. When the weather is 'perfect for making love.'

My answer comes all too soon, when Bud's voice comes through the answering machine. "Captain? Colonel? Harm? Mac?"

I chuckle as he addresses all four of our personalities. He's always had a hard time separating the rank from the friend.

"…are you there? Harriet's water broke! We need someone to take the kids…"

Mac leans over me, and I fight the urge to take another mouthful as her breast brushes against my cheek. She's laughing when she grabs the phone. "We'll be right there Bud. Tell her to hang in there okay. Yes…calm down, she's done this 5 times before, remember? Okay, we'll be there in ten."

She hangs up and looks me in the eye, and we both burst out laughing.

"Do they ever sleep?" I ask.

"About as much as we do." She says, as she gets up and starts to dress.

"Yes, but we don't have six kids."

"Thank God. We can barely keep up with our two. Let's just hope nothing ever happens to Bud and Harriet. We're God parents to all of them."

"Good Lord!" I snap my fingers, as I swing my legs over the side of the bed and search for my boxers. "I got it. Now I know what we're getting them for Christmas."

"Oh really? What's that?"

"Body armor!"

We're still laughing as we head out the door.

End of scene. Good? Bad? Stale sweat socks? Let me know.


End file.
